The Return of Captain Invincible (1983)

Directed by: Philippe Morai
Starring: Alan Arkin, Christopher Lee

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Captain Invincible: I'll say one thing for you Patty... you've got moxie.
Patty: What's moxie?
Captain Invincible: Nevermind.

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The Return Of Captain Invincible - the fall-and-rise story of Superman-type Captain Invincible (Alan Arkin) - has one of the all-time great 'overly-elaborate villain schemes.' Let's see if I can get this into one sentence: The evil Mr. Midnight (Christopher Lee) uses his nepharious Giggle Gun to capture the US government's Hypno-Ray in order to sell ocean-side property in New York to various ethnic minorities so that he can use high-powered explosives (which he detonates from his subterranian lair hidden under a delicatessen ) to turn the ethnic-filled property into a floating island that he can destroy with a nuclear-powered submarine attack. Huh... I did it.

But Midnight didn't count on the return of the once washed-up superhero Captain Invincible! I'm not posting a full review of this film, because, as you can see, it is the type of movie that defies easy description, but in the spectrum of parody movies I'd say its closer to Top Secret than Don't Be a Menace While Drinking Your Juice. The amazing trailer for this movie was a big hit for the Alamo Drafthouse crowd at both QT6 Australia Night and BNAT 7... luckily the film as a whole holds up pretty well in comparison. In addition to the above-summarized plot, you've got a lumpy Alan Arkin in silver spandex, bizarro weapons like a Gefilte Fish gun, a great Dr Strangelove-esque military room sequence, and a handful of songs by the guys who did Rocky Horror Picture Show. That's right, it's a musical.

The songs are hit and miss, but the ones that hit... oh man... they hit hard. The two best are at the beginning and end of the film, respectively. The first song - The Bullshit Song - consists entirely of one guy repeating one word over and over, and is much funnier than it has any right to be. Think of it as a Terrance and Phillip 'Uncle Fucka' precursor. But by far the best song - and the best reason to watch this movie - is sung by Christopher Lee. Until you've seen Lee sing about the benefits of booze you haven't really lived. So, as a courtesy to my loyal DD readers, all you have to do is click below and enjoy. The aspect ratio is jacked, but there's nothing I can do about it. Enjoy.

- Micah